we're blogging at a bar
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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