I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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