You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
