Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
How naked do you want me to be?
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