so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
