I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
