Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
