I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize