If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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