she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
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