You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
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