Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize