I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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