Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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