Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
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