I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
