i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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