Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
