You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
