it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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