i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
