it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
