So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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