I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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