you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
