Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
