Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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