How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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