I just pynch a tree in the face
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I need to calm my uterus...
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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