hell yes lets make some ravioli
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
