Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
we're making bets on your personal life
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
