is your mom at the bar?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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