I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
