i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
The uberlube is also flammable
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize
