You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
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