If i come over, it means nothing
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
