I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
