I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
