is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
he quoted the bible to break up with me
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
