My underwear smells like fireworks.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
