I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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