benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
