I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize