Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
