Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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