just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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