he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I love you. Go after that dick
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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