had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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