The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
