How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
